Q. Where I live, there aren’t a lot of dating choices. Most of the men are already married or they’re gay. I recently went out with my neighbor who is a Buddhist. He is a good person and he is very generous. My question is, should a Christian marry a non-Christian? After all someone has to introduce them to them to God. What if this is God’s way of sending me a husband and leading him to salvation?
Rachel
A. Dear Rachel, I totally understand your dilemma. You want a meaningful relationship and you don’t want to miss out on what God has planned for your life. But I can tell you for sure that it would be unfair for God to command us to “not connect ourselves to unbelievers” (II Corinthians 6:14) and then send you a Buddhist husband.
That’s like telling your kids not to play with fire, but giving them a beautifully wrapped box of matches for their birthday.
Marriage is the MOST connected you’ll ever be to another human being.
As a Christian who is married to another Christian, I must tell you that there are still lots of challenges to over come.
We continuously have to come into agreement regarding money, kids, in-laws and more. I’m grateful that we both share the same values and standards.
I can’t imagine what it would be like to have those same discussions with a non-believer who doesn’t regard the Bible as truth and who would never take counsel from a Christian Pastor. In addition to all of the above, I’m guessing we’d have disagreements over whether or not I’d be allowed to give offerings; if our family would celebrate Christmas and Easter; or whether our kids would go to church on Sunday or to the Buddhist temple.
If you really want God’s best for your life, I suggest that you do much praying and soul-searching before your heart grows closer your neighbor.
In the meantime, you can influence him without dating him. You can pray for his salvation and be the best example of Christianity so that he want to know more about Jesus.
